UPDATE: Slate apologizes for Hillary.

UPDATE II: Thanks to … just for the record for posting my PS without credit.

Now this is Gonzo:

That’s either an early picture of her in her Southern days, or her secret love child with Burt Reynolds.

But anyway, the fumbling biddy is still stuck on stupid. She joked off her Black English Vernacular-fueled pandering to African-Americans by saying the “country is ready for a multilingual president.” She noted she’s lived in the south and the north, and Illinois (which is so far away from our Borderland it appears to be in Canada).

Last we knew, converging one’s dialect with BEV, in order to get votes from African-Americans, goes over only slightly better than New Illinarkansans adapting hip-hop lingo and calling everyone “nappy headed ho’s.”

What will she do in Detroit? Adopt a retro-House rhyming style, riffing off Don Imus and Snoop Dog? What about North Dakota? Will she say, “Ya” alot? How about Brooklyn, or the Bay Area, or Maine?

Linguistics graduate students must be salivating over their research proposals right about now.

Now, it seems like anytime a big name screws up, s/he is obligated to embrace his/er suck, like Hillary is now doing. What else could she do? Sink her campaign by apologizing on Al Sharpton’s radio show? That’ll never happen, not by her or any of the presidential candidates. That’s like throwing yourself on a pit barbecue and inviting over several hundred of your worst political enemies for the cookout.

You’ve got to admire political handlers who stay up all night thinking up reasons why some FUBAR act by a politician is not only natural and reasonable, but good for the country. There’s this big call-girl scandal going in DC, but that’s nothing. A few for-profit tarts simply can’t compare to the conniving campaign call-girls who work for these candidates.

Obligatory Southwest Border Angle: Fake doesn’t cut it here. The desert is harsh, and many lives are too, and conceit, arrogance, pandering and other common traits of aspiring politicians are perceived as inefficient and potentially life-threatening in a tough and dangerous environment. Ask the snake curled by the cactus what he thinks of Clinton’s attitude and he’ll tell you: “Hsssssssss.”

BACKGROUND: Here’s the awful, patronizing, near-racist Selma Hillary.

And here’s the YouTube clip of Suth’run Hillary, Part II.