San Diego Union-Tribune editor and CNN columnist Ruben Navarrette asserts that healthy local Mexican economies near the US border curb illegal immigration. Of course they do, Rube! Thank NAFTA for that.

Unfortunately, the scribe — who spends two paragraphs establishing his American bona fides (although he still calls himself Mexican-American), is as off-base as a Guatemalan without papers in Oaxaca (being an undocumented migrant in Mexico is a felony offense that gets one up to two years in prison).

Well, that “I’m blood and so I know” crap puts a chill on Ruben’s transnational flag-waving. On account of you can’t tell which flag he’s waving right now. Perhaps a Stars and Stripes but with red and green stripes. Maybe the Flag of Mexico with a bald eagle with the sustentation plumage downwards touching the tail whose feathers are arranged in the natural fan indicating migration routes north. I don’t know.

Or maybe I do:

Navarette doesn’t write like he’s sophisticated enough to understand how his US experience influenced his “Mexican-American” thought processes.

Hey, Rube, if you’re going to pay into Social Security, maybe you ought to identify yourself as American. Helps a lot when you turn 62. Although I understand it keeps doors open when you need them: affirmative action lawsuits, political positioning, speaking engagements at universities, and taking advantage of offered tokenist positions at regional newspapers.

Tokenista Junior argues that illegal immigration can be slowed by “rooting for the economies of Mexican border cities.” That’s hogwash. The overwhelming majority of illegals don’t come from the border states. They come from Central America and the Mexican interior where, in the case of the latter, Mexican politics, corruption, poor infrastructure, and damning agricultural policies drive able-bodied persons north. Why till the rich soil of Michoacan when working the rich soil of America pays so much better? Why are the rich fields of Michoacan fallow, anyway? That’s a problem Navarette hasn’t wrapped his Mexican-American noggin around, perhaps because he can’t or won’t travel much further south than TJ.

Navarrette compares illegal immigrants to drugs when he describes American labor requirements as an “addiction.” Equating drugs and labor is illogical, dumb and useless, because it won’t flow in the halls of Congress. Migration and drugs remain two separate (and unequal) topics. He ought to know better.

The SDUT editor really screws the pooch in his final paragraph: “It also shows why Americans will never be able to find the solution — because we’re the problem.” This is a dumb summation, possibly (but not bloody likely) wrapped up by some CNN editor. It is trite and disappointing. The Rube is without hope that “we” will every find “the” solution — whatever that is (he didn’t propose one) — to whatever the issue is (he muddled that by talking about his roots, illegal immigration, Congress, Governor Perry, border fences, en el otro lado, Bush, political honesty, high-speed rail lines and labor, in 500 words. I won’t even comment on his “people are hurting me” opening paragraph.

Who at CNN decides what bleeds and leads, anyway? College interns? Hispanics? They populate the best kitchens, you know. Perhaps their influence is far greater than Tipsy and George ever imagined.

4 Borders Pundit really didn’t know magical realism appeared in anything other than fiction. So I’m throwing away all those years of grad school in favor of CNN columns. There is far more magical realism here than in any college course.

So we are the problem, eh? Us in the US — you and me? Not the corruption in Mexico the Rube dared mention? Not failed Mexican economic policies? Not the all-but-implemented “safety valve” of migration Mexican politicians understand and plan for? Not the economic benefits of remittances? Not the automatic US citizenship granted to the children of illegal migrants? Not the fact that life in Mexico is shit for most Mexicans? Surely a “Mexican-American” would show some heart for the problems in the land of his ancestors, or at least more than a two words: corruption and desperation.

Rest assured Navarette, benefitting from his ancestors’ foresight, is not desperate.

Too bad he’s too busy asserting his Mexican-American identity, all the while sucking at the teat of an America that white immigrants largely produced, and he sucks as hard as his illegal cultural brethren do.

Good luck with the SDUT and CNN gigs, Rube. I hear they pay well.

Addendum: Heh. Note the caution from CNN on his latest piece, CNN being better at minding its bottom line than the Rube: The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of the writer. I don’t agree: they are approved by some convention of CNN editors, and they are their responsibility as well.